Tim and I live a huge, big, busy life. Seriously. God is good. We are blessed. We are happy. We work hard. We fervently pray to God and work through the issues that come up. We just take it a day at a time walking through the busy schedules we have. We hardly ever stop. Thru all this we are just human. We struggle, have days we don’t feel well, days the kids act up or need serious medical attention. Days there are many doctors appointments or surgeries. Everything good you see in us, is God. It is all God. Praise the Lord.
Living this life…. one huge thing we now know and have learned after all these years. One thing that when you have a family like ours and live the kind of life we are blessed to live is….as a married couple, we need to spend regularly scheduled, quiet time, together alone. I think this is true for any couple, no matter what your life is like. But often the busier life gets, the more time gets carved out of the husband and wife’s time together and sometimes never gets put back in. No marriage is so good that it can run on auto-pilot for too long without damage and those two people start growing apart and never even know it.
In our marriage we have to purposefully scheduled time together. One of those times for us is Friday night movie night. We don’t have piped in T.V. in our home (we haven't for 15 years) but have DVD players on the TVs. The kids get to watch a show or movie, previewed by us, on Friday nights and sometimes on Saturday nights as well.
So Friday nights the kids work together to plan a meal…like grilling burgers, hotdogs or something special. Then they plop down all over the living room floor to watch their movie and eat their food for the evening.
As they quietly do that, Tim and I have a “date night” every Friday night, eating our dinner in bed, watching a movie together undisturbed.
Well, relatively so. ;) Enough to either eat and enjoy a full meal together. Or sometimes while the movie plays we sit and talk about our life and plans.
Often times we eat and then fall asleep during the movie. :)
Tim has every Sunday off and one other day though out the week. I am the Volunteer Chaplain at our local hospital on Sundays so it takes me all Sunday morning to do my rounds and visit with all the patients. But when I get home, Tim and I spend the rest of the day together. Even if it is doing something with the children we try to just enjoy the time together. The other day of the week he has off, we try to spend at least a part of it together alone. That does not always happen because some of his days off he takes a child to an appointment in Atlanta because I can’t drive that far. But for the most part we either run to get a few groceries together or just go walk around a store together talking and planning. Sometimes we just get away and have a short meal together. But on his day off, we try to have at least a few hours, by ourselves together alone.
On his last day off, he and I had to go and get finger printed for foster care. Fun date huh? But really it was so nice just to go to the next town together alone. We got finger printed and then went and walked around Lowes dreaming and making plans for our home someday. Ways to make improvements to make things more functional because some of our kids will never leave when grown.
I have so many severe food allergies that I have no restaurant I can eat out at. But I always pack me a lunch so Tim and I can go to one and he can eat out and get what he wants as a treat on our dates. No matter how simple our time out is spent, it is always so much fun and so nice to just be together. Talking, planning and growing together.
Every since Tim and I made it a priority in our home, to carve out regular time together, something amazing happened. We have always been close and loved each other. But I can honestly say now in life he is my very best friend. He is the one I choose and want to spend time with when we have a little free time. He is the one I want to call and chat with, share my heart with, cry on his shoulder and receive comfort and encouragement from. I miss him all day and can't wait to be with him when he comes home in the evenings.
God is so very good to us all the time. Relationships are so important. That all important relationship with God first and foremost. Then taking that time to really connect with our spouses, to talk, listen and just be one together. Of course then there is our kids. Our time means everything to them. Making time to make things special. Taking time to really listen to them and make memories with them. Lastly, but very important, our extended family and friends, the “not forsaking fellowship” part of our lives as Christians. Truly, relationships are what make life so rich and beautiful. It is not the stuff and things. It is those relationships we build and pour our prayers and time into that grow and become so deep and rich. That is what keeps our marriage strong and all relationships going.
Genesis 2:22-24 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
May the Lord God in heaven make Himself so real to you today. May He reach down and make those relationships in your life so strong. Helping you carve out the time in your life not only for growing a wonderful relationship with Him, but all those around you that you love.