My Quiet Little Man

Zeke is probably the quietest child in my home.  He does not talk much and when he speaks, he normally speaks very quietly.  If you don't catch what he says the first time, he often will not repeat himself.  He is quiet, calm, and non-obtrusive and only gets upset if he gets into dairy, wheat or if we try to force him out of his routine or comfort zone.   As with most children that have autism, we had many years of hard times and therapy.  He was not always as calm and easy as he is now but has been now for many years.  When he does get into trouble, I have to gently discipline him or he will weep for literally hours.  Quietly and uncontrollably.  Non-consoleably.   A small lecture, in a low and quiet tone, is usually sufficient as a reprimand. 

This is the flacid look Zeke has all the time on his face whether he is having a good time or not.  Whether he is happy or not.  I have to ask him to look at me and smile to take a picture and end up with five pictures like this or with him smiling and looking another direction before having a great one where he is both making eye contact and with a smile.  Believe it or not, in the above picture he is happy and relaxed for him.  He fidgets and has facial ticks if he is bothered or upset inside.

The way autism effects Zeke, seems to make him VERY routine oriented.  For him to function daily, without melt downs and anxiety, we try to keep his portion of life as non-changing as possible.  I know it sounds like we cater to him and his whims but trust me, it just makes our life so much easier and his too.  Just a pretty calm, happy life for us all, with him, if we avoid the triggers that send him over the edge emotionally.  I could not imagine having seams of clothing bothering me so badly that I can not concentrate or soft lullaby music grating on nerves as badly as it does for him.  I do very few blog posts on him, as he does the same things, in the same order, pretty much day in and day out.  He gets up and does his day according to his chart we have hung on a wall for him.  He quietly does his school program in the morning/early after noon and then in his free time he disappears into his train/lego area and makes little to no noise.  He likes making videos of his toys and narrates them for us.  He likes spending time with his pets.  If we have to go somewhere he plays on his Kindle.  All of the other children in the home have outgrown him, as far as playing with him.  He still loves Bob the Builder, Blues Clues and playing with Thomas the Tank Engine wooden railway system.  All of the other children have matured to the point they don't actually play anymore.  BUT!  I have seen him starting to play with "B" our 2 year old foster son and they seem to like the same things and play on the same level, so hopefully they will continue in this area and have fun with each other.  With Zeke, things like this (relationships) are slow moving.

The other children all have things going on that I write about.  The girls do ballet.  Carolyn takes riding lessons.  William has several things he is involved with like archery, working on his VWbug or his stop animation.  By the way, William started a new Youtube channel.  It is still in the making and called Lego Bro 4 Studio, if you want to stop by and check out the newest videos he is creating and adding from time to time.  Antonio is usually my second quietest and least involved with activities.  He does not like to go outside much as the heat makes him vomit and cold makes his Cerebral Palsy extra tight and painful.  So we have to carefully plan out the trips or places we take him.

Recently, I realized that Zeke has been happily stuck in his quiet little world for quite some time.  Tim and I talked a lot about what we could do for him that would make a happy memory and make him feel special.  He usually only smiles if I ask him to, so it is hard to tell what makes him really happy.  Trust me, he loudly lets us know what does not make him happy!

What we decided to do was plan a special weekend with just him and his dad.  We saved and planned for two months.  It was a lot of fun and Zeke knew nothing of it.  We did not want to cause him any anxiety so kept it a secret, even from the other children.   We even packed his things the night before without him knowing.

Last Saturday morning Tim woke Zeke up and told him they were going to spend some special time together and they left. 

They went out for breakfast on their way out of town. 

I think this picture is from the next mornings breakfast...Tim took them all and sent them to me.

There destination was the Tennessee Railway.  Zeke loves trains. 

They spent the morning looking at and walking thru all the trains and railway cars. 

Then they went on a long train ride.

They even ate in the dinning car. 

Tim could tell Zeke was really enjoying himself as he was so calm and interested in looking at and touching every detail.  The train stopped at one place and they had a look around.

Praise God it was a good plan and they had a really great time. 

That evening they ate at one of Tim's and Williams favorite restaurants in the area,  Ribs and Loins.  They went bowling and then spent the night in a hotel.  

The next day I got all the barn work done and the whole rest of our crew around, stopped and picked up Stephen on the way and met Tim and Zeke at the Tennessee Aquarium. 

For those readers and family that say they would like to see me on the blog once in a while, here is proof I was there.  I carried baby "K" for the day.

A friend had donated some money toward us taking the children to the Aquarium for a visit.  Thank you "L.L."  We all had a wonderful time. 

We had not been in a long time. 

Probably about five or six years.  Long enough that Elizabeth does not remember ever going.

So it was a very nice time that everyone enjoyed so much.

It was also so nice to be all together with Stephen for the day as well.  A special treat.  Believe it or not it was cheaper for us to get the family membership than to pay for each individual person in our family for the day.  So now if we come up with the gas money at some point we can go again sometime.

Zeke my quiet little man seemed to have a wonderful weekend.  We love him so much and never want him to feel over looked.  He is a huge and special person in our life.  A wonderful son.

 

Psalm 95: 2-3  Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song.  For the LORD is the great God, the great King above all gods.

Blessings,
susan